Seems I’ve been pondering effective communication quite a bit these days, more recently about at what frequency I should target my interaction with my children, and now today about my communication with my other half.

The other day I said to my husband, “Look, we need a new yew.”

And what he heard was, “Look, we need a new ‘you’.”

He stopped in his tracks, dropped the wheelbarrow, and responded, “What did I do this time?!”

Apparently I didn’t make it any better by adding, “Nothing. It’s not a big deal; I’ll just go out and get a new one”.

The look on his face was not entirely one of concern for our landscaping, so I then pointed to the dying perennial in our front garden.  “Look at it!  It’s all brown and disgusting!  I don’t want that to be the first thing people see when they walk up our front walk”.

I can only imagine what he would have thought had I made fun of the absence of green thumbs in his genes.

As I set to pulling out the old ‘yew’ from its roots, I got to thinking about how fewer the misunderstandings there are between my husband when I just text him; no verbal communication whatsoever.  Certainly the mix-up over whose ‘yew’ and who’s ‘you’ would never have happened if I’d just texted, “I’ve gone to the garden centre to pick up a new healthy green yew. Brb!”text talkOur textual relationship is pretty strong for a couple now married 22 years. Actually, it’s great in fact, especially when you consider that we only just got the ‘text talk’ maybe four or five years ago. And from whom did we get the ‘text talk’? Why, our kids, of course. IKR?! We rly nEded 2 b schooled 2 B kewl! We’re just amateurs but we text all the time now.

When we argue, there’s no eye rolling, no door slamming, no hanging up the phone, just a lack of signal (or at least that what we both plead). The texting naysayers will say we’ve lost that loving feeling but honestly it’s the most civilized form of communication we’ve ever experienced, except for the occasional premature autocorrect. If he gets bored with our routine, I don’t really care because I know our online personas are so reliable and faithful. There are just so many fewer misunderstandings. It’s not like one of us is from Mars and one of us is from Venus on this type of communication, we are both equally and joyfully inexperienced and experimenting.

Anyway, all is well now after I fully explained myself and my need for a new yew. I’m not sure if he was relieved or not.  Maybe he was looking for a new yew too.

9 Responses to Believe me, it’s not you, it’s yew!

  • Astra, you had me in stitches! But when you said you needed a new yew, I thought you meant a new ewe, and didn’t realize you were raising sheep. But now I get it, and I hope your hubby does, too. I just adore your refreshing perspective and take on life. Oh, and I enjoy texting too. Who needs to talk on the phone when they can text? But I’m not as up on the jargon as you, so maybe you need to do another post in which you explain it all? 😉

    • Thanks for the encouragement, Monica! Writing an entire post on text jargon may just be the challenge I need to connect with my teenagers this summer 😉

  • My husband and I are so much more polite to one another via texting as well! So funny! By the way, I have about 20 yews you can have in my yard.

  • I read it the same way as Monica – thinking your sheep needed a new female to bleat (or whatever it is they do) about. Too funny. Communication can be tricky. And the texting is making poor spellers of us all. I shudder…

  • Your turn of phrase and play on words make me jealous – you’re a master. My mind isn’t wired this way, but that doesn’t stop me from wanting. Aside from my shallow self, I am glad to hear you and yew, are sticking it out.

  • It’s so strange, hubs and I have some great conversations via text. What’s that about? OMG I wish I could have seen your husband’s face! LOL Priceless.

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About Astra
Ottawa mom of 3 poking fun at myself, motherhood, and minor hockey! I am steering through life dodging stinky hockey gear and empty wine bottles.
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