“Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail.”
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
Looking back I guess I should have known. All the signs of a deteriorating relationship had been there for months, maybe even years. Maybe I saw them, maybe I didn’t. I do know that I didn’t want to admit it to anyone, most of all myself. As with many close relationships, I was blissfully unaware while “love” slowly slipped away.
At first, he just rescheduled a few of our dates. Then, it progressed to his cancelling them outright without explanation. Finding time to rendezvous was proving more difficult and onerous. And when we were together, it was like he was really somewhere else. Like so many other signs, I put this off also to his crazy schedule, and remained happy – grateful even – for the attention he did bestow upon me. Still … there were some days he would barely look me in the eye, too busy with satisfying his own needs. I slowly began to realize that all he saw was another woman. I was just another woman. Another woman for whom “doing the little things” was too much of a burden.
And so now I am faced with the grim and painful reality: it’s time for me to find a new hair stylist.
I feel so naive. I’m not even sure how to go about this … what words to say to make it easier on us both. How did I not know that more than half of all relationships with hair stylists sadly end in split ends. This is all still fresh to me and a little hard for me to fully articulate my feelings, but this I know to be true: I’ll be better off for it! This is something I’ve put off for far too long. Plain and simple, he no longer fulfils my needs either. Instead of making me look like Meg Ryan, I look like Camilla Parker-Bowles. It’s pathetic really; how much my own self-worth and acceptance relied on his judgment of me all these years. Even more pathetic is the small fortune I’ve handed over to him, the mountains I’ve moved just to get in to see him, and the babysitters I have paid. If my husband ever finds out… Well, then again, my husband is still barely speaking to me after I rescheduled our 21st anniversary dinner just so that I could take my stylist’s last minute cancellation (costing as much as our anniversary dinner).
A break-up with your stylist shouldn’t be messy, but it can be tousled. I mean, it’s one thing to break up with my stylist, but I do now have to worry about the colour-lateral damage. I will no longer be able to show my face in that same salon again, so have to break up with my pedicurist and esthetician as well. These are the unfortunate side effects of a break – up: it will sadly affect so many innocent nail polish colours.
And so? What now? How does one go about finding a new stylist? Is there a eHaircuty.com? LavaLocks.com? A stylist and his or her client are a match made in heaven, until dark roots do they part. I’m not sure if I can deal with an exasperated new stylist bending over me, prying for personal details like, “Oh my God, who did this to your hair?!”
No. Maybe I should just stick it out. Stay together with him for the sake of the highlights. I’m so conflicted. Someone please help me before I resort to blind appointments, clandestine one-afternooners, or an airport salon tryst [gasp!]!
I think need an intervention …
I hear there’s a new masseur at my salon …